Poetry? The Walk

I make no claims to being a poet. This is simply what came to me yesterday as the Pixie and I walked through our neighborhood in the rain.

The Walk

The world is mine today
Empty, abandoned
In the wake of some apocalypse
I must have slept through this morning

Dull little houses line
Oil-slicked streets
Blank windows, locked doors
Sing a requiem
for Suburbia

The ground is black
And bitter as used coffee grounds
The sky is gray
As my mood
Or the hair I found
This morning

One wiry antennae
Sticking straight up
From my skull
Receiving all messages of
Doom and gloom

Doom and gloom
Gloom and doom
Mist wraps around me
A second, clammy coat
My bat black umbrella
Flaps overhead
The leaden sky bleeds acid rain
Forcing all the sugar mamas
To stay inside
And gawk as I shuffle by

They’ll melt, they’ll melt
My god, they’d melt!
If they ever set foot outside

But I don’t have
That concern today
I’m old and sour
As a basket
Of assholes
And the rain, the rain
Fits me like a glove

Doom and gloom
Gloom and doom
The world is mine
The world is grey
And I shuffle through it
A zombie at home

In the damp, in the dead
In the swampy mists
Only one thing seems amiss
One small detail out of place
The little Pixie who dances
At my side

Her tiny pink coat
Is a shocking wound
In all this glorious misery gray
It rips me
Out of my stupor and into
A world where squirrels
Natter and birds
Shriek and shrill and puddles
Wait to be stomped

Splash and dash!
Dash and splash!
She flits around
The little busy buzzy bee
Tearing my world apart

Her high pitched giggle
Like a sword-thrust
To my senses
Simply kills my good bad mood
Like holy water on vampires
I am forced to step out of my
Steaming gothic remains
Into the world of the living
Again

Splash and dash!
Dash and splash!
Look Mama
A bird!
A squirrel!
Another puddle!

The world is hers
Not mine
I hope I can surrender it
With grace

Fiction Friday – The Mummy Case

One thing I really want to do more of these days is read, and since I got my netbook and an account at Fictionwise.com. I’ve read four books so far since Christmas, and while that may not seem like a lot, that’s way up from last year’s reading, as least as far as fiction goes. I regularly read computer graphics magazines and skim through tech manuals, but that’s not enough to satisfy my soul. I’m a fiction writer, so I need to be a fiction reader, too. Besides, I love reading too much and have been jonesing for some good stories to devour.

Right now, I’m enjoying Elizabeth Peter’s ‘The Mummy Case.’ This is the third book in the Amelia Peabody books, one of my favorite mystery series. The stories are all set in Egypt at the turn of the century. Amelia Peabody and her archeologist husband, Radcliffe Emerson, delve into the mysteries of ancient Egypt while dealing with contemporary crimes. This particular case involves the murder of an illegal antiquities dealer, Protestant missionaries raising havoc with the Muslim populace, and a Roman style cemetary in Coptic Egypt. And of course, the titular mummy case, which appears and vanishes repeatedly throughout the tale.

One of the best things about the Amelia Peabody series is the relationship between Peabody and her husband Emerson. They almost never address each other by first name, but prefer the affectionate use of last names instead. Peabody is a strong-willed, educated woman in a time period where woman were expected to be anything but strong-willed and educated. She enjoys adventure, loves Egypt as much as her archeologist husband, and defies all the conventions of her time. Her husband is an excellent match for her – handsome but hot headed, equally intelligent and educated, a believer in equality for all people, and a non-believer in all religious aspects. They’re an unusual pair, to be sure, but there’s a strong, invigorating romance going on between them that’s both passionate and believable.

And that’s probably what I enjoy the best. I am no reader of romances, mainly because I can’t buy into the idea of two people falling in love at first sight and immediately running off to get married and live happily ever after. That’s not to say I don’t believe in love at first sight, but after 15 years with my husband, I know love takes a hell of a lot of work to make it last. Most romances don’t show me any of that work in progress; they fail to display the foundations for a lasting relationship in my opinion. Yes, heroine and hero may desire each other, yes they must triumph over many obstacles to be together, but all their gooey-eyed protestations of love in the end don’t make for a lasting relationship. Peabody and Emerson share a sense of practicallity that reminds me so much of my own marriage, it’s almost frightening. For starters, Peabody doesn’t get all bent out of shape when her husband argues with her (he almost never believes her ‘fantasies’ of looming danger or crimes about to be committed). Instead, she knows he’ll eventually come around when enough evidence of a crisis presents itself. In the mean time, she humors him and continues to investigage on her own. As for Emerson, he may blow his top from time to time, even at her, but he knows how to apologize, and he knows better than to try and keep his wife under his thumb to prevent her from doing the things he thinks she shouldn’t be doing.

I guess what I”m trying to say is that there is no angst in this relationship. They don’t worry that one may not love the other. It’s simply an accepted fact between them. I by far prefer that type of romantic relationship to one where the heroine has to play ‘he loves me, he loves me not’ and that ends up being all she does in the book. I also appreciate the fact that Peabody doesn’t play games with her husband. She’s up front with him, blunt even, about what she wants, where she’s going, etc. She doesn’t need to make him jealous, and in fact is careful to avoid situations where she feels he might become jealous, as she knows he’ll kill any one who dares to assume an unwarrented familiarity with his wife. It’s not that he fears Peabody will leave him for another man. He just thinks other men should know their place.

So I’m enjoying the Mummy Case, and the entire series. And I really love the fact that I can get all these books in e-format. It’s just so convenient to be able to buy and immediate download the books and keep them on my netbook so I have the entire library at my fingertips. Although I have discovered one inconvenience with this set up.

I can’t read the netbook in the tub. Dang.

Coming Together: Al Fresco – Availabe April 22nd, 2009!

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If you love erotica and the great outdoors, here’s your chance to enjoy the two combined! Coming Together: Al Fresco, edited by Alessia Brio, will be out on Earth Day, April 22nd, through All Romance e-Books. Yes, your’s truly is in this one, with an m/m erotic tale entitled ‘Afternoon of a Faun.’ This book will be in e-format only, in keeping with the conservation theme. You can pre-order Al Fresco now, and remember, all proceeds benefit Conservation International. GREEN is the new black!

Episode 26 – I Have A New Book! AAAAUGH!

OH MY GOD!!! I HAVE A BOOK COMING OUT!!!

Seriously, I’ve spent the last few months running around like a chicken with my head cut off AND my ass on fire, trying to get ready for the release of “Future Perfect: A Collection of Fantastic Erotica.” Final edits, cover art, announcements, promo, conventions, more promo… I’ve pulled more all-nighters than I have since Pixie was a new-born, maybe even more than I have since grad school (and that was a loooooooong time ago). It’s been a lot of work, and I hope you all find that it’s worth it.

Future Perfect will be available both in digital format and in print from Logical Lust. It will also be listed on Amazon.com, and I believe there will be a Kindle format for it as well.

I will be at Farpoint this weekend, the 13th-15th of February, in Timonium, Maryland. I’ll be there as a writing and podcasting guest (and that feels so good to say – I was INVITED to be a GUEST!). I plan to have 20 copies of Future Perfect, plus copies of “Coming Together: With Pride,” “Cream: The Best of the Erotica Readers and Writers Association,” and hopefully a few copies of “Demon By Day.” I’ll also have some swag – bookmarks and postcards, and maybe even some nifty looking buttons for the Heat Flash Erotica Podcast.

I have to thank Michael for everything he’s done through all this. No kidding, that man really does have a halo. He’s taken the kids more evenings and weekends than I can count, caring for them while I lock myself away in the office to work. He’s put up with my weird schedule (weekends off? Who the hell gets weekends off?). He’s fixed computers, built computers, bought computers, and probably executed a few computers for me (the last I’m sure he did as humanely as possible). And he’s taking the girls again this weekend as I take off for three days of pimpin– er, promoting the new book up at Farpoint.

I still have a lot to do after the convention. I’ve got to get promo put together for EPICon 2009 and prepare for a panel I’m doing on podcasting there. Plus Michael and I have a three-day karate camp to attend, and Princess has a birthday coming up this month (so do I, but we really don’t want to talk about how OLD I am, do we?). But, come March, I’m hoping that things finally start to settle down a bit. I won’t be taking on any more new deadlines, but instead plan to concentrate on what’s already on my plate.

Any other news? Oh yeah! I’ll have a story in the upcoming “Coming Together: Al Fresco,” edited by Alessia Brio. This is another charity anthology, which means I’m donating the story, but I have to tell you, competition to get into these anthologies is fierce, so I’m happy to be given the opportunity to participate.

I’m sure there’s lots else going on too, but right now I’ve got a slippery Pixie fresh out of the tub and I need to catch her and slap a pull-up on her before we have an incident. Have fun this week! And don’t forget to…

BUY MY BOOK!!!

Writing and Self-Indulgence

I apologize for cross posting this to here and to my writing blog, but I’ve been slammed for time, and I need to get a blog post up here anyway I can. 

I’m feeling horrifically self-indulgent today, or rather I feel horrific because I was self-indulgent today.  The local schools were closed today for the election, so I didn’t have to worry about getting to the bus stop by 3:15 to pick up my oldest daughter.  She stayed home with me and her little sister, who had a temperature of 102 degrees.  The youngest acted fine most of the day, but because of the fever she actually took an afternoon nap for the first time in almost six months.  A very loooooooong nap.

With the youngest sound asleep and the oldest happily drawing and playing in her room all afternoon, I was actually able to enjoy my old work schedule of three uninterrupted hours of work today.  I handled a few e-mails, battled it out with a horror story that refused to settle on a plot line, and wrote over one thousand words in that time.  I didn’t focus on the story that was on my to-do list for today – I was too obsessed with fixing and then writing the horror story.  But I definitely got something accomplished.

And I feel horrible about it.

Should I have knocked off at 3PM like I usually do on school days and spent more time with my eldest daughter?  I know she was perfectly happy in her room, working on an art project for her kindergarten class (an art project that is due on Thursday and was going to require a lot her time to complete anyway, I might add).  I just can’t believe I had so much time today to write!  I haven’t had such a luxury in ages, three uninterrupted hours.  At best, I manage to get an hour in the afternoon to write most days because one child comes home from school at 3 and the other refuses to go down for a nap anymore.  I need this kind of time to write, and my taking it and using it didn’t hurt anybody, so why do I feel so crappy about having spent the whole afternoon doing what I love?

Maybe I ate too much chocolate today.  Damn Halloween candy…

But seriously, I need to do something about my work schedule, about my daily schedule.  I need to find a way to get back those three hours of writing time, yet still tend to the needs of my kids.  It simply kills me that I can’t do this anymore.

Anybody else feel horribly guilty when they get time like this to work?

Episode 08 – What I write about

I’m late, I know. I had to check the URL that I included in the cartoon. This is both a true story and a bit of shameless promotion for a project that has become near and dear to my heart. Coming Together is a series of erotica anthologies put together and sold for charitable causes. I have a story in Coming Together: With Pride. The proceeds go to AVERT.org to support HIV and AIDS research. There are a number of other books in the series, some of them award winners, all of them good anthologies put together for good causes. You can find out more at the Coming Together website. Alessia Brio, the editor, will be a guest tomorrow night on Passion Internet Voices Radio. That’ll be at 9PM-11PM EASTERN time. She’ll be playing audio excerpts of some of the stories, including mine, and some of the writers will be joining her for interviews. If I still have a voice tomorrow after fighting with a nasty cold, I’ll be there.

I’ll get to work on another cartoon right away, I promise. It looks like it’ll be a couple more weeks before I’ve got a website set up for the cartoons, but once it’s up, I’ll be sure to let everyone know.

Demon By Day now available from Mojocastle.com

Huge news. My first book, Demon By Day is now available from Mojocastle Press. Here’s the blurb:

In the twilight realm of Daeva Shudra, there dwells an ancient race of demons. Once the most powerful beings on earth, the Daeva must hide in their underground city or be burned to ashes by the sun. The world above belongs to mortals now, inferior creatures with limited abilities for magic, easy prey for demonkind.

Between the two races comes Orziel, a half-breed struggling to survive the deadly schemes of his immortal kin. His only weapons are his vicious beauty and ruthless cunning. Otherwise, he is powerless and despised. But lack of power doesn’t check Orziel’s pride or ambition. All his life he’s lied, seduced, and betrayed to get whatever he’s wanted, including his lover, the demon prince Asheru. When Empress Shebazael claims Asheru as her own, Orziel swears he’ll do whatever it takes to take back what’s his, regardless of the consequences.

The half-demon travels to the surface, in search of a mortal sorcerer to aid him in his quest. But things go awry when Orziel seduces Jarresh, a beautiful youth with no magic beyond his capacity for love. Will Orziel stand by the only person who’s ever truly cared for him, or will he betray Jarresh to carry out his revenge?

I’ll be selling print copies of the book at Balticon. If you’re there and you want one, just grab me by the arm and let me know. And if you’re interested in hearing the audio promo I put together for the book, check out this week’s episode of the Heat Flash podcast. Heat Flash is my free weekly podcast of erotic short fiction. There’s a new story every Friday. The promo for Demon By Day is at the end of this week’s episode, so take a listen!
That’s all I’ve got for now. I’ve got to get some sleep so I can drive up to Balticon tomorrow morning. I’ll try to post a few entries while I’m there.

I Was Interviewed For The Balticon Podcast!

On the writing/podcasting/would-be professional front, I was interviewed this past weekend by Paul Fischer of the Balticon Podcast. The interview is Nobilis about erotica podcasting, writing sexy stories, family values for erotica writers, and everything in between. We also talked a bit about what we’ll be doing at Balticon this coming Memorial Day weekend, where Nobilis and I will both be guests working on the adults’ new media track for the convention. We had a great time discussing all the naughtiness we plan to get into, so take a listen to the interview and check out some of the rest of the Balticon podcast. Also stop by and listen to Paul’s podcast (one of my all time favorites), the ADD Cast.

Keep in mind, we are talking about erotica here, and the talk naturually gets rather explicit, so don’t listen to this any place where you might get into trouble, like say… church or work?

By The Way, I Survived Fantasci 6

Just thought I should mention that I survived Fantasci 6, the sci-fi convention I went to a couple weeks back. I was there to represent EPIC (Electronically Published Internet Connection), and spent all weekend talking to people about e-books. The convention wasn’t as nearly as large as the staff predicted it would be, but I thought it was worth attending. I got to run a fan table for the first time ever, talk to folks about e-books, and I spent most of the weekend with Kathryn Lively from Phaze Books, which is not a bad thing when you are a writer who would eventually like to publish with Phaze. Nope, not bad at all.